One of the volunteers that answered the letters to Santa was a convicted sex offender but the story says that he was stopped before he could answer any letters. I now want to write the guy in prison or wherever he is hiding as a little kid asking for toys and see what he had in mind when he hatched his plan to molest via the US Mail. Unless they captured him with a pocket full of penis pictures I just don’t get it. I have to figure out how to get a fictitious boy and girls list to this idiot in prison because my curiosity is killing me.
I noticed my first bell ringer last night and it has me pondering an exciting life of service in the Salvation Army. As I was walking in to the store and the army man was ringing his possibly weaponized bell I was wondering if they had a Special Forces branch. As I was inserting my protection change into the bucket I asked the question but this imposter was wearing knock-off gear. He was just staring at me when I accused him of stealing the money that the real Army of Salvation scares from my pocket.
I told him that I would be reporting him to the Salvation authorities and if they do in fact have a Special Forces branch he should expect a visit.