hanging with me

Last night didn’t end well. My stealth Hawks fan watching of the game didn’t last long as I began shouting and pacing the worse things got. Then I began to catch sh*t from a Minnesota fan on the stool next to me. I didn’t have a leg to stand on until he pulled out his electronic cigarette. My smile in the midst of misery must have give me away because he immediately barked a challenging WHAT?!

“Why does your pacifier have a light on it?”

He tried to turn things back toward the Blackhawks beating but I would have none of it.

“If you put it in your ear does it double as one of those douche-tooth wireless things?”

“Do you ever catch a glance of yourself in a random reflective surface while using that thing and get hard?”

Okay I might have been a little cranky because my team was getting drubbed. That third period was miserable for me so I wanted to spread the wealth. Things went south quickly after the game ended and I took things a bit too far. Unrelenting oral fixation talk centered around the light calling attention to it. I might have mentioned he would be blowing a mag light in public soon when he and his friend had had enough.

I was planning my strategy when the bar tender stepped in and made them leave. My mouth was less offensive than the 2 drinks they spilled earlier. They mentioned something about waiting outside but I went up to my room after paying my tab so it must have been a long wait.

I might not be built for long term exposure to just me. I might have to write off the whole hermit idea. Maybe a cult? Walked by a big branch office this morning…

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