I’m being weined

The NFL is trying to break it to me gently by disrupting my Sunday routine. With only two games to play they are mucking around with the start times to try and lock in my eye balls as long as possible in anticipation of the upcoming drought. As I sit here staring at a single game my brain longs for the constant excitement of the Red Zone channel. I have way too much time to think. Partially why I am currently thumb typing to you right now.

The other reason is I caught myself going through my upcoming work schedule and that will just not do. This is MY DAY dammit and I will not start thinking about work until tonight. That is how Sundays work.

Currently bubbling to the top of my head is why would Peyton Manning be a spokesman for Nationwide insurance when Mutual of Omaha is the natural choice?  That idiot says the name of that godforsaken town more than people who live there. If you happen to live there I am sorry. Not because I said it but I am truly sorry for your plight.

If he really wanted to entertain me he would customize the nonsensical audible calls to each opponent. Some clever way to throw shots at the opposing sideline. Or maybe use fan names every week. I know he is a big religious guy so he wouldn’t need that as a lure but I would bid at a charity auction to have him chant my full name every down on live TV. I’m willing to bet that Papa John has tried to get him to change things up.

Speaking of Papa, I need to meet him in person because his hair sets off my wig-o-meter. I can’t be sure from TV and the proof would be a top down view. I need to stop now because this little phone screen is not helping me keep track of my thought train on this post. (see what I did there? track… thought train… I still got it)

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