So the electrician was here again yesterday doing what he could while dodging rain storms. Who knew that opening up your exterior electrical service box during a downpour is asking for trouble? With no power I have to take and make work calls on the old cell phone. Not the end of the world but lack of internet means no computerized anything so I had me some time to kill between calls.

That’s when the salesmen from AT&T dropped by to let me know that their records indicated I no longer used their service. I stared straight at the kid who spoke for twenty-five excruciating seconds before what I assume to be his trainer stepped in. “he meant to ask you why you no longer used us.” Another statement not requiring communication from me by any standards of polite human discourse. so I waited.

The kid finally asked so I told him it was because the Uverse sucks. He was unprepared for this answer so his boss stepped in and asked what my problem with the service was… Ten minutes later I had given him my laundry list of issues and the findings of the last senior technician to visit my house who tole me I might have to wait a few years for things to improve.

The manager had now forgotten his trainee and tried to feed me some bullshit about fiber optic cable. I interrupted by telling him I was very familiar with my pole (yup, I know what I said just now and then when I did it the first time) and no one has run new cable anywhere in my block. He then told me that they were running this new magic cable to the nodes that distributed the cable to the neighborhood. He had no counter when I asked if he wasn’t just bringing the fire-hose closer to the  drinking straw that led to my house.

We went back and forth for the next fifteen minutes and it became very apparent that this trainer was not ready for a consumer who knew anything about his service. He shuffled his student away when I began to ask the kid how his new job was going. I wanted to know if he got anything per hour or if it was straight commission. The trainer dude turned red when I started telling his that if this gig didn’t work out there are tons of high paying jobs available in the trades for someone willing to work hard.

and then my phone rang.

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