I would like to begin this one in the spirit of a football cheer. You say SNARKY I say ASSHOLE, snarky – asshole, snarky – asshole. I was standing in line at a local inconvenience establishment when I witnessed a woman in front of me be flat out mean to the person in front of her. It was a shot at him possibly being mentally deficient due to his lack of speed during the checkout procedure. Her taunts did not speed anything up so when a second shot was fired I figured it was time to join in. I began by asking if being mean to another person made her feel good? She looked taken aback but I explained that I myself really enjoyed a good shredding I just try to choose people that can go back and forth. A one sided tongue lashing to someone else who doesn’t want to participate and has done no other harm than waiting for their proper turn just seems mean.

She didn’t really know what to make of me after an up and down glance but she forged on with some details about where she had to be and she decided to finish with some nonsense about just being SNARKY. “So everyone else has to pay for your piss poor planning? and by the way SNARKY is just a polite way of calling yourself an asshole” no reply but my man had his stuff and was out the door. Still waiting I felt it was my duty to press plus what else was I going to do with her in front of me? “What is the time limit that the earlier gentleman exceeded because you are twenty seconds in and have yet to show a form of payment? Plus your indecision towards which cancer sticks to buy is killing your time. I might need to get SNARKY in a minute here.”

She picked her smokes and while she waited for her transaction to go through she decided to tell me that wasn’t what SNARKY meant. “it means kidding…“and now you have just that you are the elusive dumbshit-asshole. I wish you a happy albeit statistically truncated life” Now THAT was snarky.


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