Lucky today

I got to head out into the real world today because I am stupid but that is telegraphed by the title of this entire site. Stupider than normal I should have said. Anyway, I was doing my work thing visiting some local members of my organization and everything went great until I stayed too long and had to scramble back to the office to make a series of scheduled calls. So I was in full street racer mode when I got passed by two kids in actual street racing mobiles. I looked at this as the perfect cover. I would follow them at speed but not copying their dumb-ass weaving in and out of small traffic gaps. I even went as far as making up my just-pulled-over story that started with one of them grazing my car and me making chase… just in case

I don’t know what its like where you live but in ol’ Illinois construction zones are posted with all kinds of dire warning about fines doubling and $375 minimums. I tend to take the photo enforced ones seriously as my household is on a one per month red light camera violation pace lately and I really enjoy the view from my high horse. Just as I was slowing down street racer one and two ran into some trouble. It seems that traffic in the real world doesn’t cooperate like a Need For Speed movie. I didn’t see everything that caused the trouble but I was there for the traffic all stop and the slow crawl. By the time I passed car #2 was in the actual construction area with a grip of cones piled up in front of his car. I think it was too low to the ground to run them over so it piled them up like the worlds dumbest bulldozer. Oh and one of those orange barrels was tipped over at what looked to be his emergency entry point.

As I passed there were four construction dudes all with phones up taking pictures and the police were in my rear view mirror. I can’t imagine what kind of fine rape that kid is in for but he just has to bend over and take it like a man. There is no way he is talking himself out of the trouble headed his way. I didn’t understand at first glance but it was weird that he didn’t get out of his car. Could it be that he forced one of the construction fellas to hot foot out of his way? If so, good luck Speed Racer.

When I stopped up ahead for a pop (I know HOW MUCH OF A HURRY WERE YOU IN IF YOU STOPPED… but this place has the good crunch pellet ice and it was part of my speeding home plan from the outset. and I am an addict. judge away.) Racer #1 could not have been more obviously waiting. As I walked by I decided to be nice and let him know his buddy would be a while. “FUCK YOU” I didn’t have time for the verbal duel that response required so I just took a picture of his license plate and told him I was calling the cops to tell them the other street racer was sitting in front of me. Normally a risky move as you walk into a convenience store but I was in a rental and I always take the damage coverage. He was gone when I came back out.

That crunch ice is the shit.