I need to start with a public service announcement of sorts to assist my fellow online only shoppers. I heard about ebates for a while but thought it was a scam. Then a friend that I trust to be filled with less BS than the average person let me know I was not being smart. So I tried it a week ago as I placed the first of my Christmas shopping orders. Just had to click the little icon after I installed the chrome plug in thingy to activate whatever savings and rebates they had available. Worked on three out of four places I shopped and now I have $24 that I would have just left on the table. Just letting you know it’s out there. https://www.ebates.com/rf.do?referrerid=OydvkyWqya9sTbsnIT8wGg%3D%3D&eeid=29041

With that plug out of the way I can get on with the topic at hand. I am not going to beat on the Black Friday drum too hard but why do people wait in line outside of a store to maybe get lucky and be able to get one of the limited amount of deals? It don’t make no sense. Seven hours or more in the cold and weather to have a shot at at an average deal at best. Speaking of best; (no idea if that punctuation makes any sense right there but it felt right so I went with it. If its wrong eff off, but if correct I meant to do that the whole time) Best Buy ‘s 8:00am Door Busters were $250 off of last years technology TV and half off of a shitty $200 laptop then some other random things that make you into a complete dumbass if you were in line. My sleep is worth more than that. Or really my time doing absolutely anything other than sitting outside hoping to be one of the idiots to get a deal that I can come awfully close to online.

I went to Best Buy this afternoon to pick up an online door buster that I paid for over the interweb. I got there and had to wait in a small line with the other smart people. Luckily for me the line was right next to the customer service line and that entertainment did not disappoint. There was a lady yelling at the top of her lungs about price matching the Walmart ad. The girl behind the desk was awesome in her explanation that they could not possibly match the price for something people waiting in line to buy at six in the morning. It was three in the afternoon by the way… The woman wanting the discount thought that waiving the ad and raising her voice was going to get her the deal. awesome human beings are everywhere.

I got my deal and asked the kid helping me how the day was going as we both watched the woman. He told me that the worst so far was a guy who purchased a TV sevenish months ago and wanted money back because it was less than half the price now than what he paid. After the manager tried to explain he came across the counter and had to be walked out by security. I had questions that my helper could not answer like did he drag his TV in with him and were the police called but the kid just looked at me with the glassy eyes of the shell shocked. Retail workers earn every penny this time of year. I was thinking how fun it might be to completely loose my shit in a store but walking out at the same time as the unmatched price shopper changed my mind. She was trying to start an impromptu walk out slash boycott based on her current state of injustice.

I took a little risk as we were walking out into the parking mess by saying “Strong work in there. I’d like to see you in action if someone was trying to put a pipeline across your lawn.” I got nothing. Not even the finger. Look, I don’t need a lot in this world but if I’m trying to pour salt on a wound I would really appreciate an ouch.